College is great because last semester I got to write my final lit paper about comparisons between Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein and Joss Whedon’s Firefly, and I named it “The Best Literary Analysis in the ‘Verse” and got an A.
“This is my laundry time. So, you can use this dryer, but it’s actually my laundry time.”
Are you effing kidding me? You’ve done two loads already, and they were predominately underwear and striped fuzzy socks. I know because I had to move them, because you left them in the washer for twenty minutes after the cycle ended. You do not need three hours to do your laundry. You are not going to die if you don’t get to wash your thousands of G-strings tonight.
Don’t roll your eyes at me, you piece of poop. I have done nothing but work this week, and I have not had more than 6 hours of sleep a night, for two weeks straight. I am period raging so bad that I could set fire to a whole forest with the sheer force of my rage. I spent over three hours raking leaves in the cold, after it rained, so that I could earn 20 dollars that went directly toward school funds. And I haven’t had anything to eat but hummus and grapes for nearly a week.
I know that you have no way of knowing that I’ve had a hard week. And I know that you signed up for those three hours fair and square. But you still have no reason to talk to me like I’m a fly in your soup just because you have at least a foot on me. And don’t think that I can’t headbutt you so hard your brains fall out of your butt. I just want to have clean clothes and watch Supernatural. Cheesus Crust.
Best college assignment so far: Watch and analyze Joss Whedon’s Serenity.
I found the trick to writing a paper that I really don’t want to do:
Drink a bottle of water and tell yourself that you can’t go pee until it’s finished.
Just finished my last final. My freshman year of college is officially over.
My academic adviser used Internet Explorer while we were scheduling my courses for next year. And I’m supposed to trust this woman with my future?
I’m trying to finish a paper for my English 104 class and this is very distracting.
Today I saw a guy painted completely blue, rolling around campus on a razor scooter wearing a cape that said “Happy Friday” on it. I want to go home.
The entire Ball State campus smells like a wiener today.